John Stamos caught his ex girlfriend in bed with Tony Danza
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John Stamos is busy promoting upcoming memoir If You Would Have Told Me, which is out on October 24. (Good luck competing with Britney, John!) Last week, we talked about how John wrote that he “hated” his ex-wife, Rebecca Romijn, after their divorce. It was a whole lotta “Yikes.” But Romijn isn’t the only former partner that John writes about in the book. He also alleges that while dating Teri Copley back in the 80s, he caught the actress in bed with none other than Tony Danza. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting to be talking about Tony Danza gossip in 2023 (or ever), but here we are!
[John Stamos] is opening up about the demise of his relationship with actress Teri Copley in his upcoming memoir “If You Would Have Told Me.” Stamos alleges the “We Got It Made” star cheated on him with actor Tony Danza.
Despite his head-over-heels courtship with Copley, Stamos writes that the actress began to give him the cold shoulder after he returned from touring with car show appearances and performing with the cover band Papa Doo Run Run. Concerned about Copley’s lack of communication, Stamos headed over to his then-girlfriend’s house to check on her. Upon arriving at Copley’s home, Stamos noticed a car parked in the driveway.
“I shuffle to the car with my stomach sinking and take a quick look inside. There’s a hairbrush, keys, boxing gloves and a half-unrolled poster of my girlfriend, naked, barely covered by a white sheet,” Stamos writes. “I’ve never seen this poster before.”
After being unable to open the front or side doors to Copley’s house, Stamos went to the “Brain Donors” actress’s guesthouse, where he found “four feet protruding from the shabby-chic, floral print duvet that once kept me warm.” Stamos wasn’t able to recognize the man Copley was in bed with, referring to him as “Mr. Porsche Speedster” for the vintage convertible parked in Copley’s driveway.
“My heart is beating out of my chest,” Stamos writes. “My mind is racing, and the room is spinning. I feel like throwing up all over her white shag carpet. It’s my worst nightmare.”
Just before leaving Copley’s home, Stamos grabbed the poster of Copley that was inside the Porsche for a closer look. The poster was signed by Copley with the message, “My Dear Tony, I’ll love you forever.”
While driving home and listening to the Elton John song “Tiny Dancer,” Stamos says he realized the identity of Copley’s lover. “I mouth the words to his most famous lyrics and realize the name of my rival, ‘Hold me closer, Tony Danza.’”
Reportedly, Stamos also goes on about Danza’s “ripped abs” intimidating him from physically confronting the pair, which really makes me want to make a joke about Danza being Stamos’ boss, but I can’t quite get there. For her part, Copley has denied that she was cheating on John when he walked in on her and Tony, explaining that they were already broken up when it happened! She told People, “I wondered, ‘What was John doing there?’ because we had broken up. He just looked at me and shook his head, and walked away.” Given the context clues within John’s own words, that Teri had been giving him the cold shoulder and he was “concerned” about her lack of communication, I believe Copley’s account. I bet Stamos went there either not believing they were actually broken up or thinking he could win her back. Either way, it’s kinda messed up to tell a story like that about someone, especially if he didn’t give her a head’s up and get her permission first. I’m glad Teri went on the record with her side of the story.
Also, who hasn’t sang, “Hold me closer, Tony Danza,” at least once while listening to “Tiny Dancer?” Both my husband and my little sister genuinely thought that was the lyric when they were kids, so I’ve always jokingly sang it. My sister also thought Aretha sang, “When my son was in the lost and found” when she first heard “You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman,” and at five-years-old, very worriedly asked my mom, “Why was her son in the lost-and-found? Did she find him?” Anyway, I would be lying if I didn’t snort-laugh to myself when I realized “Hold me closer, Tony Danza” were probably the exact words Teri was saying as John ran away crying. Oh, there it is. There’s the boss joke.
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